145: The Old Master of Lying Down and Winning

virtual universe, "Ten-Thousand-Man Arena."

This was one of the most popular competitive areas in the virtual universe. A small portion of one's real-world personal strength could be simulated here, allowing players to improve their combat awareness while playing games.

The games covered all competitive modes, from cold weapon fighting to interstellar fleet battles.

Today, in the most popular "Eternal Canyon" map, a super-large competitive mode similar to Honor of Kings but scaled up to ten thousand versus ten thousand...

...a seemingly ordinary match was about to begin. Chen Jun, with the screen name [Lying Down to Win Ancestor], was lying listlessly in a specially-made access pod in his own manor.

This pod was personally crafted by Mo Heng. Its exterior was styled like a primitive lounge chair, but its interior integrated the highest technology of the Federation and the Dragonborn Empire, ensuring Chen Jun's consciousness could access the virtual universe in the most comfortable and stable state. Chen Jun casually clicked the matching button for "Eternal Canyon," muttering, "I heard this game is pretty popular. Let's test the waters."

After all, playing games in reality all the time could get boring. An unadorned long life paired with games in the virtual universe was a perfect match. He chose the character [Ancient Salted Fish], a hero officially classified as a "Support" whose skills were all about healing, shielding, and shouting "666"—a pure lying-flat hero.

The character's image was a salted fish wearing flip-flops and sunglasses, slumped on a cloud. He had taken a liking to this character at first glance.

[Match Successful! Match: Ten-Thousand-Man Battle Royale · Eternal Canyon]

[Our Team: 10,000 players]

[Enemy Team: 10,000 players]

With a flash of light, Chen Jun appeared in the fountain controlling his [Ancient Salted Fish].

He yawned, manipulated the salted fish to roll over, found a comfortable position to slump in, and prepared to experience the game.

However, before he could settle in, a series of System notifications rang in his ears... [Ding! Federation Sword of Protection (Li Qingshan) has joined your team!]

[Ding! Immovable Bedrock (Shi Yue) has joined your team!]

[Ding! Truth Seeker (Mo Heng) has joined your team!]

[Ding! Dragonborn Queen (Yan Ji) has joined your team!]

[Ding! Dragon Emperor Invincible (Yan Wuhuo) has joined your team!]

...Following that was a dense, endless stream of join notifications. The ID prefixes were either "Federation" or "Dragonborn," and the suffixes were either "Great Emperor" or "Venerable," each exuding the aura of a powerhouse.

Not only had the Federation's Stellar-level Experts entered, but even a portion of the Dragonborn's thirty billion top talents had also come in... Chen Jun: "???"

While he was dazed, the team channel had already exploded—not with arguments, but with... vying for favor?

[Federation Sword of Protection]: "Ancestor Chen! Please rest assured and lie down! Your subordinate will use this sword to sweep away all obstacles ahead for you! If you point east, I will never go west!"

[Immovable Bedrock]: "Li Qingshan, step aside! To protect Ancestor Chen, absolute defense is paramount! Ancestor Chen, just stay behind me and watch me build a Great Wall for you!"

[Truth Seeker]: "Gentlemen, protecting Ancestor Chen requires science and wisdom! I have calculated the optimal path to victory for this match and have loaded the hidden attribute 'Luck Infusion' onto Ancestor Chen's 'Ancient Salted Fish.' Passive effect: All attributes of nearby friendly units are increased by 1000%!"

[Dragonborn Yan Ji]: "Your Excellency Ancestor Chen! Ji'er is willing to serve you! My 'Blazing Dragon Princess' is ready; I will surely make the enemy fountain boil ahead of time!"

[Dragon Emperor Invincible]: "Ahem, Ji'er, mind your manners. Ancestor Chen, Wuhuo's old bones will also accompany you for some exercise today. Tell me, is my 'Nine Heavens Dragon Emperor' skin pleasing to your eye?"

Chen Jun watched these big shots in the channel—whose average age started at tens of thousands of years and who could make a Star Domain tremble just by stomping their feet—arguing until they were red in the face over who could "serve" him better. His mouth couldn't help but twitch wildly... Good grief!

This matchmaking mechanism must have been specially adjusted, right?!

This wasn't playing a game; this was a group of big shots having a team-building exercise to be my nannies!

He sighed helplessly and sent a message in the channel: "Everyone be quiet. Play normally. I'm just here to play around casually."

With just one simple sentence, the team channel fell silent instantly, then was flooded with a uniform reply:

"Yes! Ancestor Chen!" x 9999

...The enemy army also noticed something was wrong.

"What's the situation on the other side? Why are their IDs all so... domineering?"

"Federation Sword of Protection? Immovable Bedrock? ...These names sound so badass!"

"What's there to fear! No matter how cool the name is, if their skills are bad, they're still noobs! Brothers, level one team fight, let's go! Let's show them what we're made of!"

Thus, thirty seconds after the game started, nearly a thousand aggressive enemy players charged toward the river with a roar, preparing to catch our side off guard.

Then... they saw a scene they would never forget.

Li Qingshan's [Qingshan Swordsman] appeared in the middle of the river like a ghost; no one even saw how he got there.

The long sword in his hand wasn't even fully unsheathed; he just gave it a casual swing—

"Clang—!"

A cyan Sword Qi spanning the entire river appeared out of thin air, instantly killing the hundreds of enemy heroes charging at the front like mowing grass!

Before they could even see the special effects, they turned into gold coins and experience points scattered all over the ground!

[First Blood!]

[Double Kill!]

[Triple Kill!]

[Ultra Kill!]

[Penta Kill!]

[...]

[Legendary! Unrivaled!]

[Legendary! Unrivaled!]

[...]

The System notification sound was like a jammed machine gun, frantically flooding the screen!

Li Qingshan's kill count instantly broke into triple digits and was still skyrocketing at a rate of dozens every 0.1 seconds!

Enemy players: "???!!!"

"What the hell?! Is he hacking?! Thousands of kills at level one?!"

"This kind of strength in a low-Rank match? I don't believe the opponents are War God Level and Planetary Level! Report! We must report! Someone is definitely hacking!"

"Where's the admin?! Come out and see God!"

...Before they could recover from their shock, Shi Yue's [Bedrock Colossus] descended into the enemy jungle like a mountain.

He didn't even use any skills; he just took a "stroll." Wherever he went, the ground cracked, and the enemy heroes hiding in the bushes to farm monsters were crushed into 2D stickers along with the monsters... Mo Heng's [Wisdom Star Spirit] floated at the fountain entrance, with hundreds of light screens suspended in front of him, his hands operating as fast as if he were playing a piano.

Not only was he monitoring every corner of the map in real-time and providing precise pings, but he also used his computational power—which exceeded that of a supercomputer—and his virtual universe permissions to directly modify the game's backend. He fine-tuned the hit rate, crit rate, and skill cooldowns of all enemy heroes... all down by 99%!

This caused the arrows fired by enemy archers to curve mid-air and hit their own teammates, mages to chant for ages only to produce a dud, and tanks to activate shields only for the shields to face inward and slap their own faces... Yan Ji's [Blazing Dragon Princess] and Yan Wuhuo's [Nine Heavens Dragon Emperor] were even more exaggerated.

The father and daughter transformed into two flame dragons that blotted out the sky, circling above the enemy high ground. Their dragon breath was like carpet bombing, repeatedly plowing through the newly respawned enemy heroes along with their defense towers and crystal... The enemy fountain?

That had already become their hot spring bath!

...Chen Jun's [Ancient Salted Fish] had been slumped on the most comfortable cloud in his team's fountain since the start, never even taking off his sunglasses.

Occasionally, when he felt bored, he would casually press a healing skill to give a symbolic heal to the nearest big-shot teammate, who were crowded at the fountain entrance vying to "protect" him.

[Lying Down to Win Ancestor] used the skill [Blessing of the Salted Fish], restoring 1 HP to [Federation Sword of Protection].

The full-health [Federation Sword of Protection]: "Thank you for the gift, Ancestor Chen! I feel my whole body filled with power! My Sword Qi has become more refined!"

[Lying Down to Win Ancestor] used the skill [Protection of the Salted Fish], adding a 1-second shield to [Immovable Bedrock].

[Immovable Bedrock]: "Ancestor Chen's holy shield protects my body! I feel my defense has increased... increased by countless times! I am even more capable of shielding Ancestor Chen from the wind and rain!"

The enemy players saw this suffocating scene through death replays and spectator views.

That salted fish with the ID [Lying Down to Win Ancestor] had 0 gold, starting equipment, was level 1, had 0 kills and assists, and 0% team fight participation since the start!

His only function was to occasionally flop around in the fountain and give those clearly hacking teammates a negligible BUFF?

But it was this salted fish that made those hackers look like they were on stimulants!

What kind of new hack was this?

"Report that Lying Down to Win Ancestor! He's definitely the leader of the hackers!"

"Admin! Where the hell is the admin?! Why aren't they banning him?!"

"Damn it, this game experience is terrible! I'm quitting!"

"I won't believe it even if you kill me—the opponents are all big shots at the Planetary Level or above!"

...By the 1st minute of the game, all enemy outer towers were gone.

At 2 minutes, the inner towers and high ground towers were all gone.

At 3 minutes, as Yan Wuhuo "accidentally" swept his dragon tail across, the enemy crystal let out an overburdened groan and exploded!

[Victory!]

The game ended.

The score was frozen at: 1,500,000 to 0.

After the 30-second start, the entire enemy team died an average of once per second, spending 2 minutes and 30 seconds soaking in the fountain... On Chen Jun's side, Li Qingshan had 58,960 kills, Shi Yue had 31,020 kills, Mo Heng had 1,500,000 assists (all map BUFFs and debuffs counted as assists), and Yan Ji and Yan Wuhuo shared the remaining kills.

As for Chen Jun's [Ancient Salted Fish], his data panel was as clean as a newborn baby's.

The match ended, entering the data settlement and evaluation interface.

[Lying Down to Win Ancestor] Comprehensive Score: 2.0, the System's lowest score.

Evaluation: [You have demonstrated the ultimate... art of lying down to win in this match? Perhaps you are more suited for... being AFK?]

However, no one cared about this score.

Because in the next moment, the entire "Eternal Canyon" section of the virtual universe, along with all related forums and channels, was flooded by a sudden golden server-wide announcement!

[System Announcement]: Congratulations to Your Excellency [Lying Down to Win Ancestor] for completing the "Ultimate Lying Down to Win" achievement in "Eternal Canyon"! This announcement is hereby made to commend his virtue! May [Lying Down to Win Ancestor] enjoy the game and have a long and healthy life!

...The announcement scrolled continuously for a full ten minutes!

The font was shining with golden light, and it even came with special effects of a Phoenix and Dragon bringing prosperity!

Following that, something even more jaw-dropping happened.

The "hackers" who had been slaughtering everyone in the match all displayed their real identity badges—symbols of the highest authority in the virtual universe that could not be forged!

Beside the [Federation Sword of Protection] badge, it displayed: Human Federation, Sword Venerable of the Nine Heavens, Li Qingshan.

Beside the [Immovable Bedrock] badge, it displayed: Human Federation, Great Emperor of Bedrock, Shi Yue.

Beside the [Truth Seeker] badge, it displayed: Human Federation, President of the Academy of Sciences, Mo Heng.

Beside the [Dragonborn Yan Ji] badge, it displayed: Dragonborn Empire, Crown Princess, Yan Ji.

Beside the [Dragon Emperor Invincible] badge, it displayed: Dragonborn Empire, Dragon Emperor, Yan Wuhuo... The enemy players who had been frantically shouting "report" and "hacking" were now collectively petrified, their minds blank.

Sword... Sword Venerable of the Nine Heavens? Great Emperor of Bedrock? President of the Academy of Sciences? Dragonborn Crown Princess? Dragon Emperor?!! ...These big figures who only existed in news and legends were actually playing a game as a team?!

And they were all on the opposite side?!

Then... that [Lying Down to Win Ancestor] whom they treated as a "dead weight" and "carried player"... who else in the entire Federation could make these big shots willingly act as bodyguards, thugs, and even sycophants?!

The answer was obvious!

In an instant, all doubt, anger, and frustration turned into boundless fervor and worship!

[World Channel]... "My god! It's Ancestor Chen! It's the venerable Ancestor Chen!"

"May Ancestor Chen live for billions and billions of years! Without Ancestor Chen, we wouldn't have the beautiful life we have today! I knew it, who else could have such a grand presence!"

"Ancestor Chen is experiencing life and observing the people! How fortunate are we to be in the same game as Ancestor Chen?!"

"Which bastard just said they wanted to report Ancestor Chen? Step forward! I promise I won't beat you to death!"

"The 'Ancient Salted Fish' chosen by Ancestor Chen must contain the supreme principles of the Great Dao! He appears to be lying flat, but in reality, he uses the posture of non-action to command the strong and pacify the chaotic world! This is the way of an Emperor! The way of a Sage!"

"I'm changing my ID to 'Salted Fish's Number One Fan'! From now on, I'll only play Salted Fish to comprehend Ancestor Chen's Dao of Lying Down to Win!"

...Public opinion did a complete 180-degree turn in an instant!

Chen Jun, who was called the "leader of the hackers" just moments ago, was instantly placed on a pedestal!

His "Salted Fish" image was endowed with the profound connotations of "returning to one's true self" and "the Great Dao is simple"!

Some even began to analyze Chen Jun's occasionally released, negligible healing skills, believing they were "spiritual encouragement" and "Luck enhancement" for his teammates, the key moves that decided victory or defeat!

The virtual universe Administration responded quickly, immediately setting the recording of this game as a "Classic Instructional Match" with the title changed to "How the Lying Down to Win Ancestor Leads a Ten-Thousand-Man Game with a Posture of Non-Action" for all players to admire and learn from.

The pick rate of the unpopular hero [Ancient Salted Fish] skyrocketed a million-fold instantly. Designers worked overtime through the night to create the "Ancestor Chen's Selection · Ten Thousand Joys Eternal" exclusive skin for it.

The image was still a salted fish, but the cloud was replaced by a lounge chair, the sunglasses by starlight glasses, and the flip-flops were embedded with stars. Priced at 9,999 virtual coins, it was instantly snapped up by a hundred million people... And at the center of all this storm, Chen Jun, after seeing the flamboyant System announcement and the frantic praise in the channel, curled his lip speechlessly... "Is this really necessary... it was just a game I played because I was bored..."