94: Chapter 94 Imperial Fashion Week: Smart People Wear "Air"
Great Zhou Imperial City, Hall of Supreme Harmony.
This should have been the most solemn and dignified place in the entire Imperial Dynasty, the center of power. But at this moment, a spectacle worthy of being recorded in the Cultivation World's "Human Confusion Awards" was unfolding here.
Chu Linger hovered on her Flying Sword above the Imperial Palace. Taking one look down, she immediately covered her eyes. "Master... my eyes are defiled."
Within the palace, from the patrolling Imperial Guards to the sweeping maids, and even the Crown Prince who was currently overseeing the state—at this very moment, they were all wearing nothing but... bright red underpants.
But that wasn't the most terrifying part. The most terrifying part was that every single one of them had a face overflowing with confidence, arrogance, and a sense of superiority that said, "I am a smart person."
An Imperial Guard commander, wearing only red underpants and holding a spear, adjusted a non-existent "armor collar" against the air and shouted, "Stand straight! Didn't you see the 'Wisdom God Armor' newly bestowed by Your Highness? This was woven from 'Void Silk' from above the Nine Heavens; only the most loyal and intelligent warriors can see it!"
The soldier beside him (also wearing only underpants) immediately puffed out his chest and looked intoxicated. "The Commander's divine armor is truly shimmering with light! Especially these invisible patterns on the spaulders—they are simply a masterpiece of divine craftsmanship!"
Chu Linger: "..." Watching this scene through the gaps in her fingers, she felt her worldview of the Cultivation World collapsing. How was this concept tampering? This was clearly a collective IQ-lowering strike!
"Don't look, that's the passive aura of 'The Emperor's New Clothes (Conceptual Version)'—the [IQ Testing Field]." Li Mo's voice came through the five-year simulation, carrying a hint of schadenfreude. "Within this Domain, everyone has been implanted with an axiom: 'People who can't see the clothes = fools.' To prove they aren't fools, their brains automatically filter out the fact that they are 'not wearing clothes' and imagine the most magnificent attire."
"Then what should I do?" Chu Linger looked at the magnificent but "flesh-colored" hall. "Should I just rush in and grab the book? I'm afraid I'll develop styes."
"Don't rush," Li Mo said. "That book has absorbed the 'Vanity Value' of the entire Imperial City and has gained sentience. Grabbing it by force will easily trigger its second phase—[Forced Stripping]. You'd suffer social death then. To deal with this kind of Idealism's Weirdness, one must use the Iron Fist of Materialism."
Li Mo paused and sent an instruction: "Open your book to page 38, 'Optical Principles: Refraction and Reflection of Light.' Then, go give that Crown Prince a 'Physics Experiment Class.'"
...
Inside the Hall of Supreme Harmony, a "New Clothes Gala" was currently being held.
Crown Prince Zhou Yunshen (the eldest son of the Emperor of Great Zhou) sat on the throne's side. Naturally, he was also stark naked (except for his underpants), yet in every gesture, he acted as if he were wearing the most solemn Nine Dragon Ceremonial Robes.
"My dear ministers." The Crown Prince stroked the air with an intoxicated face. "Father went to the Heavenly River Sword Sect to seek the Dao and left behind this divine book. The book says these 'Smart People's New Clothes' can distinguish the loyal from the treacherous. Testing it today, it seems the entire court is indeed full of loyal subjects!"
Below, the equally "cool" civil and military officials shouted in unison: "Your Highness is wise! These new clothes are light as nothing, warm in winter and cool in summer—truly a lucky omen from the heavens!" Even if they were shivering with cold, they had to grit their teeth and praise the clothes' warmth.
Just as this harmonious scene of ruler and subjects—a picture "too beautiful to look at"—reached its peak... Bang! The hall doors were kicked open.
A blast of cold wind rushed in, making the officials shiver in unison. A young girl carrying a large grey bundle entered. She wore sunglasses (to protect her eyes) and held a massive... glass prism as she strode in.
"Who goes there?!" the Crown Prince roared in anger. "How dare you intrude upon the court! Do you not see this majestic Dragon robe I am wearing?"
Chu Linger did not speak. She walked straight to the center of the hall, toward the picture book that was hovering, glowing, and continuously emitting pink mist—'The Emperor's New Clothes that Only Smart People Can See'.
Sensing a threat, the picture book immediately shrieked (in a voice only smart people could understand): "Oh no! A super big dummy has arrived! She actually can't see the magnificent clothes you're wearing! Quick, kick her out! Otherwise, the Stupid Virus will spread!"
"How bold!" A group of "armor-clad" generals were about to rush forward.
"Wait." Chu Linger pushed up her sunglasses and raised the triangular prism. "You say these clothes exist?" "Of course!" the Crown Prince said proudly. "Only a fool wouldn't see them!"
"Fine," Chu Linger said calmly. "According to Optical Principles, any matter must have a refractive index. Since you are wearing 'shimmering' clothes, light must undergo dispersion when passing through them."
With a flick of her finger, a beam of intense light hit the Crown Prince's "clothes." Normally, light would be blocked or reflected by clothing. But now, the light passed through the Crown Prince's "Dragon robe" without any hindrance, illuminating his pale belly, then reflected back and passed through the triangular prism in Chu Linger's hand.
On the wall, no rainbow spectrum appeared. There was only a stark white spot of light.
The entire hall fell into a dead silence.
Chu Linger pulled out a megaphone and loudly read the experiment report: "Experimental phenomenon: No refraction of light. Experimental data: Material density is 0. Experimental conclusion: Your Highness, you are streaking."
This word "streaking" didn't sound like a taunt; it sounded more like a judgment of truth that shattered dimensions. Physics is merciless. It doesn't care if you are smart; it only cares if light travels in a straight line.
Boom! The picture book hovering in mid-air suddenly trembled violently. Its "Idealism Rules" had crashed into the hard "Physics Laws." "Im... Impossible! You're not following the script! You should feel ashamed!" the picture book shrieked piercingly.
"Ashamed?" Chu Linger sneered, pulled a bottle of ink from her bundle, and threw it hard at the Crown Prince. Splash! The black ink splashed directly onto the Crown Prince, staining his belly black without being blocked by any "invisible clothing."
"Do you see clearly now?" Chu Linger pointed at the ink stains. "This is the fact."
At this moment, everyone's brains finally crashed. The ink stained the skin, not the clothes. This visual impact was too strong—so strong that even the "IQ Testing Aura" couldn't filter it out.
"Aaaahhh!!!" A scream pierced the air. It wasn't from the Crown Prince, but from a civil official who had just realized the truth. He terrifiedly covered his private parts. "My... my clothes?! Where are my gold-trimmed official robes?!"
Immediately, screams followed one after another. "Hooligan!" "I'm not wearing clothes!" "Your Highness... your... your belly is exposed!"
The Crown Prince's face instantly turned the color of pig liver. Shame surged like a tsunami. He, the dignified Crown Prince overseeing the Great Zhou, had actually spent the whole morning in a meeting wearing only red underpants! "The book! That's an evil book!" The Crown Prince pointed at the picture book in the air and roared, "Seize it!"
Seeing things were going south, the picture book turned into a streak of pink light to escape. "Trying to run?" Chu Linger was prepared. She suddenly flipped open her five-year simulation and shouted: "After-school assignment: Briefly describe the Wave-particle Duality of light and calculate the escape velocity of this evil book!"
[Domain Expansion: The Sea of Learning Has No Bounds, Hard Work Is the Boat.]
The picture book had just reached the door when it suddenly felt a heavy weight. Countless complex Physics formulas entangled it like chains. Although it was a concept-level Magic Treasure, it was a fairy tale book! How could it understand Wave-particle Duality? It was a liberal arts student!
"I won't listen! I won't listen! Physics, get out of the Cultivation World!" The picture book let out a desperate cry and was then heavily crushed to the ground by a massive problem, unable to move.
Chu Linger walked over, stuffed the picture book into a special Seal bag (the black plastic bag Li Mo gave her), and tied a tight knot.
"Phew, recovery complete." She glanced at the chaos in the hall, where the ruler and subjects were scrambling for clothes to hide their shame, and shook her head. "Master was right; reading more is a good thing, but pretending to understand when you don't... leads to social death."
...
Half an hour later. Heavenly River Sword Sect, Scripture Pavilion Restricted Book Area.
Li Mo took the black plastic bag Chu Linger sent back and casually tossed it into a cage in the furthest corner. A tag hung on the cage: [Extremely Dangerous: Causal Weapon (Gag Type)].
"Good job." Li Mo rubbed his chin. "Although my permissions haven't been restored yet, it seems the path of 'scientific cultivation' has great potential in this world."
At that moment, the System notification sounded: [Side Quest Completed: Recover Prohibited Book.] [Reward: Unlock special entry—'Eye of Truth (Elementary)'.] [Effect: You can see through any illusion, disguise, and... who isn't wearing long johns beneath your Realm with a single glance.]
Li Mo's mouth twitched. This reward... why did it feel so weird?
Just then, a flurry of noisy footsteps came from downstairs. It was the Emperor of Great Zhou, Zhou Tiance. He had just returned from the "Immersive Experience Park," clutching that paper with the word "Gou" on it, rushing into the Scripture Pavilion with excitement.
"Saint! Saint!" Zhou Tiance shouted toward the second floor (he couldn't enter, so he could only shout from below). "I just received a transmission Flying Sword from the Crown Prince! He said the Imperial City underwent a baptism by the 'God of Truth'! In their extreme shame, the officials broke the shackles of vanity and became honest with one another! The Crown Prince also said this was a 'radical cleansing' by the Saint for the Great Zhou court! I have realized it! Is this also part of the 'Gou' Dao? Discarding false fame to find the true self!"
Li Mo on the second floor: "..." His hand holding the teacup froze in mid-air. He could even rationalize it like that? Is this Great Zhou royal family's ability to over-interpret things hereditary?
"Forget it, as long as you're happy," Li Mo sighed and shouted downstairs: "Since you've realized it, don't just stand there. I heard the Great Zhou palace has quite a collection of books? Bring them over; I happen to have a few empty bookshelves here."
Hearing this, Zhou Tiance was instantly overjoyed: "Yes! I shall issue an imperial decree immediately! Bring all the rare editions from the Great Zhou treasury! Offer them to the Saint!"
Li Mo watched this scene and nodded with satisfaction. Collecting books was his main business. As for whether the Great Zhou court would really become "honest with one another" in the future... that was none of his concern.
However, amidst this joyful and harmonious (and ridiculous) atmosphere, deep beneath the Scripture Pavilion, the **[Abyss Node]** that had been in a silent state suddenly throbbed once.
It wasn't because of a network fluctuation or an intrusion. It was because... it smelled that "conceptual rule" scent that 'The Emperor's New Clothes' had just emitted.
In the darkness, an eye without a white part slowly opened. An obscure intent silently penetrated the floor of the Scripture Pavilion and attached itself to... Senior Brother Lei Wanjun.
"Rule... found... carrier..." "That... madman..."