30: Goodbye, my dear family!

Early morning in Tianqiong City, a thin mist permeated the air.

Beside the weathered iron gate of the Gu Family Manor—which had just been repaired only for half of it to be blown away by Elder Li, that "top-tier gardener"—parked an extravagantly styled, elongated luxury hovercar.

The car's body was spray-painted with the golden emblem of the Tianqiong War God Academy, a pattern of two crossed sharp swords piercing the sky, dazzling one's eyes in the morning light.

Gu Fan stood on the steps, not carrying any luggage in his hands.

Because as the "deeply beloved" true young master of the Gu Family, his luggage was naturally handled by "dedicated personnel."

"Second Sister, be a bit quicker. That box contains my favorite limited-edition game console. If a single corner gets chipped, I'm afraid you'll be so heartbroken you won't be able to sleep."

Gu Fan leaned against a pillar, holding a cup of hot latte freshly dispensed from an automatic coffee machine, smiling as he watched Gu Wanqing moving large and small bags onto the car.

Gu Wanqing wore a set of simple sportswear found from who-knows-where. Her originally proud, large wavy curls were tied into a casual ponytail, and her face was devoid of makeup, yet she had two large dark circles under her eyes.

Hearing Gu Fan's words, her hands carrying the box shook violently, and she almost dropped it.

"It's... it's not broken! I'm handling it with care! Absolutely with care!"

Gu Wanqing's voice carried a hint of trembling, and her gaze didn't dare to linger on Gu Fan for more than a second.

In her eyes, the current Gu Fan was no longer that trash younger brother who could be bullied at will, but an evil god in human skin, a walking urban legend.

The events of the past few days had completely shattered her worldview.

Her father went bankrupt, her mother was disfigured and socially ruined, her eldest sister became a frog that could only croak, her third sister's intelligence regressed to that of a toddler, and her younger brother Gu Yu was in an even more pathetic state... Only she, because she had knelt in time that day and used the black card to act as a wealth-distributing boy, had miraculously become the only person in this family with a sound body and a clear mind.

"Master Fan... this is the last box."

Gu Wanqing wiped the cold sweat from her forehead and walked cautiously to Gu Fan, bowing so low she seemed to want to bury her head in the ground. "Do... do you have any other instructions?"

Gu Fan took a sip of coffee, reached out, and lightly patted Gu Wanqing's shoulder.

"Hiss—"

Gu Wanqing's whole body stiffened, and she almost knelt down to him on the spot.

"Second Sister, don't be so nervous."

Gu Fan's tone was gentle, much like a caring younger brother about to go on a long journey. "Once I go to the academy, the family will depend on you to hold things together. After all, the current Gu Family is truly 'the old, the weak, the sick, the disabled, and the pregnant'... Oh wait, no pregnant ones, only the disabled."

"Remember to take good care of Eldest Sister. If she wants to eat bugs, go to the flower and bird market to buy her some high-grade ones. Don't let her catch them in the garden herself; it's unhygienic."

"And Third Sister, buy imported milk powder and change her diapers frequently. Although she only has the intelligence of a three-year-old now, we can't discriminate against children, right?"

Gu Wanqing nodded frantically, tears welling in her eyes: "Yes, yes, yes! I will definitely take good care of them! Definitely!"

"Um, so well-behaved."

Gu Fan nodded with satisfaction. "You keep that Eden black card for now. The password is Gu Yu's birthday... Oh, wait, it should be my birthday now. After all, I am the true young master. The family's expenses are high, so don't mistreat yourself."

Gu Wanqing froze for a moment, suddenly looking up with a flicker of unbelievable gratitude in her eyes, followed by deep fear.

This demon actually left her money?

Is this the Last Supper?

Just then, from the main road outside the manor, came the roar of an engine.

A somewhat worn-out commercial van drove in and parked next to the glitzy luxury academy car, looking completely out of place.

The car door opened.

Two caregivers came down first, and then they carried a stretcher and a wheelchair out of the car.

Lying on the stretcher was Gu Zhan.

This once high-spirited business tycoon of Tianqiong City now had a sallow complexion and cloudy eyes. He even wore a neck brace, clearly suffering from severe aftereffects of that day's "interrogation room floor dance."

And sitting in the wheelchair was, naturally, Gu Yu.

He was in an even worse state than Gu Zhan.

His right leg was in a thick cast, suspended high up. His face was wrapped in bandages, revealing only two bloodshot eyes and a slightly swollen mouth.

Those were the double medals left behind from the previous phone explosion and the septic tank journey.

They had been released on bail.

Although the police had gathered quite a bit of evidence, a starved camel is still bigger than a horse. Gu Zhan had used his remaining connections and funds to temporarily arrange bail pending trial, under the guise of "returning home to recover."

As soon as the father and son got out of the car, they saw Gu Fan standing on the steps, relaxed and beaming with joy.

The atmosphere on the scene instantly became tense.

A stark contrast.

On one side was the miserable appearance of defeated soldiers and a broken family; on the other was a young talent about to head to a top-tier institution with a bright future.

Gu Zhan's chest heaved violently, and a "gurgling" sound came from his throat—a roar of extreme anger that couldn't be released due to his damaged vocal cords.

Gu Yu gripped the armrests of the wheelchair so hard his nails almost sank into the flesh. His gaze was venomous, as if he wanted to set everything on fire.

"Oh, isn't this Father and Brother?"

Gu Fan acted as if he didn't see the Killing Intent in their eyes at all and waved enthusiastically. "What a coincidence. I was just about to leave, and you came back to see me off? This family affection is truly touching."

"See, I told you we're a family, our hearts are linked."

Gu Zhan was so angry his eyes rolled back, and he almost passed out.

Who the hell is here to see you off!

We came back to take refuge!

But after witnessing so many bizarre events, the father and son had learned their lesson.

They didn't dare to curse out loud.

Because they discovered that as long as they started cursing Gu Fan or tried to lay a hand on him, the one who ended up unlucky was always themselves.

Therefore, they chose "mental cursing."

The two exchanged a glance, seeing the same tactical intent in each other's eyes: [Endure! Silence is better than words right now! Curse him to death in our hearts! Curse him to have a flat tire, to choke on water, and to be struck by lightning at the academy!]

Gu Yu vented wildly in his mind: [Gu Fan! You bastard! Just get lost! Better yet, die on the road! Never come back! You've ruined us so badly, I curse you to be lonely and abandoned by everyone for the rest of your life!]

Gu Zhan also roared in his heart: [rebellious son! You destroyed the Gu Family! You destroyed my life's work! I, Gu Zhan, swear that as long as I live, I will watch you fall from the clouds and be smashed to pieces!]

This silent, extremely suppressed mental energy, containing the dual meanings of "seeing off the plague god" and "vicious curses," converged into an invisible black torrent and rushed toward Gu Fan.

[Ding!]

Just as Gu Fan lifted his foot to descend the steps, the pleasant System notification sound arrived as scheduled.

[Detected 'Mental Funeral' malice from 'Gu Zhan' and 'Gu Yu'.]

[Malice nature: Surface silence, inner toxicity, hypocritical farewell, wishing for the host to drop dead on the spot.]

[Malice Rank: A+ (This kind of suppressed hatred is the most mellow).]

[Backlash triggered! Multiplier: 95x!]

[Random effect generating... Detected that the host is about to go on a journey, and the scene is at the main gate, with spiritual items representing "protection" and "house-guarding" nearby.]

[Congratulations, selected: Immersive Farewell Ceremony (Stone Lions' Wild Dance - Safe Travels Edition).]

[Effect description: Since they hope so much for the protagonist to leave with a "grand funeral," let these pair of Stone Lions, who have seen too many dirty things, express this heavy "filial piety" on their behalf.]

The smile on Gu Fan's face grew even wider.

He stopped, turned around, and made a "please begin your performance" gesture toward Gu Zhan and Gu Yu.

"Father, Brother, don't just keep it bottled up in your hearts. Some emotions need to be expressed."

Before his voice had even faded.

"Crick... crack..."

A tooth-aching sound of rock grinding suddenly rang out.

Before Gu Zhan and Gu Yu could react, they felt the ground vibrate slightly.

They subconsciously looked at the two majestic white marble Stone Lions at the main gate.

These two lions were carved by a Great Master commissioned by Gu Zhan for a high price, weighing several tons and looking awe-inspiring.

The one on the left had a close encounter with Senior Simp a few days ago, and even now, a faint tooth mark from Young Master Zhao seemed to remain on its stone mouth.

At this moment.

Those two pairs of originally lifeless stone eyes suddenly lit up with two clusters of eerie red light.

Immediately after, the stiff stone joints of the Stone Lions seemed to be injected with lubricant, and they actually slowly... stood up.

"Roar—!!!"

A roar that didn't belong to the biological world at all, carrying a metallic texture and the sound of grinding stones, made Gu Zhan's eardrums ache, and the stretcher almost flipped over.

"They... they're alive?!"

Gu Yu was so scared his eyes almost popped out. He tried his best to shrink back in his wheelchair, but because the movement was too large, his broken leg hit the armrest, making him grimace in pain, yet he didn't even dare to scream.

The two Stone Lions did not attack anyone.

Like two well-trained honor guard soldiers, they took heavy steps, making "thumping" sounds, and actually walked behind Gu Zhan and Gu Yu.

Then, the lion on the left extended its massive stone claw and grabbed the two handles of Gu Zhan's stretcher, lifting him and the stretcher vertically.

The lion on the right pushed the back of Gu Yu's wheelchair.

"What are you doing! Let go of me! I am the head of the family!" Gu Zhan shouted in terror, hanging from the stretcher like a sausage, his feet off the ground.

"Respectfully... seeing... master... off!"

A low, heavy voice that seemed to come from deep underground squeezed out of the Stone Lion's throat.

This voice was full of a sense of ritual, solemn and... eerie.

Then, the tone suddenly changed.

The originally serious scene, due to the distortion of some rule power, instantly became ridiculous.

The two Stone Lions actually started humming a strange tune, the rhythm of which was a bit like a funeral suona melody and a bit like electronic music in a nightclub.

"Untz-untz-untz-untz!"

The Stone Lion on the left, holding Gu Zhan, began to perform extremely standard "squats."

Gu Zhan was like a toyed-with doll, going up and down in mid-air at a very high frequency, shaken so much he became dizzy and disoriented, almost vomiting stomach acid.

The Stone Lion on the right was even more ridiculous, pushing Gu Yu's wheelchair and starting to drift in circles on the spot.

"Wuhu—!"

The Stone Lion even made onomatopoeic sounds.

Gu Yu felt like he was in a drum washing machine. The wheelchair's wheels sparked against the floor, and his broken leg swung back and forth under centrifugal force. The combination of pain and dizziness made him truly experience what "a fate worse than death" meant.

"Have a smooth journey! Go missing halfway! Bah! I mean, soar to the sky!"

While dancing a wild square dance, the Stone Lions roared out variations of the curses in Gu Zhan and Gu Yu's hearts.

Watching this scene, Gu Fan couldn't help but applaud.

"Good! Great dancing! I didn't expect Father and Brother to arrange such a grand 'Lion Dance Blessing' show just to see me off!"

"The creativity, the investment, and the immersive sense of participation—I give it a perfect score!"

The caregivers and Gu Wanqing were already dumbfounded.

They huddled in the corner, trembling, watching those two multi-ton Stone Lions dancing gracefully in the morning sun while pushing two disabled people.

This scene was both terrifying and filled with a certain absurd comedy.

They danced for a full five minutes.

Until the driver of the academy's luxury car couldn't take it anymore and honked the horn.

"Beep—"

The two Stone Lions paused.

As if they had completed their mission, they performed a final, perfect "curtain call"—

Plugging Gu Zhan's stretcher into a flowerbed and pushing Gu Yu's wheelchair into the fountain.

"Splash!"

"Offended you, old buddy!"

After saying this line full of modern slang, the two Stone Lions slowly walked back to the main gate, lay down, their red light extinguished, and turned back into cold stones.

Leaving behind a mess and two "heads of the family" questioning their lives in the water and soil.

Gu Zhan was planted head-first in the flowerbed soil, with only his two feet kicking wildly outside.

Gu Yu was drinking bathwater in the fountain pool, with the wheelchair flipped over on top of him like an overturned turtle.

Gu Fan walked to the car, and the driver had already gotten out to open the door for him.

Although this young driver was wearing sunglasses, his trembling hands still betrayed his current mental breakdown.

He had been driving for the academy for many years and had picked up countless geniuses and freaks, but this was the first time he had seen someone leave with a "supernatural circus" seeing them off.

"Mr... Mr. Gu, please get in."

Gu Fan turned back and took one last look at this place where he had lived for twenty years.

Looking at the fake young master still struggling in the fountain, looking at his biological father planted in the soil, and at his second sister huddled in the corner trembling.

"Goodbye, my warm family,"

Gu Fan said softly, his tone devoid of lingering attachment, only a sense of relief from finally shedding a burden.

"I hope when I come back next time, you'll still be this 'lively'."

He sat in the car, and the door closed automatically, cutting off the noise outside.

The hovercar started smoothly, quickly ascended, turned into a streak of light, and disappeared into the horizon.

Inside the cabin, it was luxurious and comfortable, with soothing classical music playing.

Gu Fan leaned back against the leather seat and took out the "Tianqiong War God Academy Special Recruitment Admission Notice" sent by Envoy Wang Zhong.

Turning to the last page of the notice, there was a list of this year's specially recruited freshmen.

His gaze swept over the names of those so-called geniuses and finally stopped at an inconspicuous corner.

There was a name written there—

[Xiao Fan].

The note was simple: [Special recruit from the remote Ninth District, no background, Martial Dao talent rating: ?]

Gu Fan's eyes narrowed slightly, and his finger lightly tapped on that name.

"Xiao Fan..."

"No matter how you look at it, this name reeks of a 'protagonist vibe'."

"Orphan? Trash counterattacking? Or carrying an Old Man in the Ring?"

Gu Fan closed the list and looked at the clouds receding rapidly outside the window, revealing a playful smile.

"Interesting."

"I thought academy life would be boring, but now it seems a new source of fun is already waiting for me there."

"I hope this classmate Xiao Fan's mental fortitude is a bit stronger than my brother's."

"After all, you can't always shear the same sheep; it's time for a new flavor."

Sunlight pierced through the clouds and spilled onto the speeding car, casting a prologue full of variables for his upcoming academy life, indicating that this "Backlash King," who had stirred up monstrous waves in Tianqiong City, was about to start an even more ridiculous and hilarious legend in that academy where geniuses from the entire Federation converged.