1: Chapter 1 Opening the Door at Shen Shi (3-5 PM)

2030, Jiangzhou City, Old District, raining.

This autumn rain had been falling incessantly for three days, soaking the entire Taiping Old Street until it felt like moldy, rotten wood.

The air was filled with an inescapable, chilly dampness.

Most of the leaves on the crooked locust tree at the street corner had been battered off; the few remaining withered yellow leaves hung from the branches like the tongues of hanged ghosts.

The residents of Taiping Old Street had closed their doors and windows early. Occasionally, one or two pedestrians wrapped in raincoats would hurry past, subconsciously quickening their pace when they passed by the [Lins Funeral Shop].

"Clatter!"

A harsh sound of metal scraping echoed through the quiet street.

Lin Ye yawned, pushed the rusty rolling shutter door up with all his might, then brushed the dust off his hands. He turned to look at the dark, cramped shop, his mouth twitching uncontrollably.

On the shelves to his left, gold and silver paper ingots, incense for guiding the way, and rows of lifelike paper effigies were neatly arranged.

The glass cabinet on his right was stuffed with various styles of burial clothes and yellow talisman paper.

Because it never saw sunlight, the shop always had a strange smell, a mixture of cheap sandalwood and aged preservatives.

Lin Ye looked up at the wall clock.

Three o'clock in the afternoon.

Which is the "Hour of Shen" in the twelve traditional Chinese double-hours.

"Where on earth did the old man learn the rules from, some cursed, smoke-billowing Feng Shui book..."

Lin Ye muttered to himself while pulling a thermos out from under the counter, unscrewing it, and taking a gulp of goji berry water.

He was an unemployed youth who had just graduated not long ago. His parents had gone missing years ago, and he had been raised by his grandfather since he was a child.

Half a month ago, his grandfather had also left behind a suicide note and vanished without a trace.

Besides handing over this Funeral Shop, which included a two-story detached apartment in the city center, the note also contained one strict rule:

[To inherit the property, you must guard the shop for three years. Open the door at the Hour of Shen every day and close it at the Hour of Yin; you cannot skip a single day.]

Opening at the Hour of Shen meant three o'clock in the afternoon.

Closing at the Hour of Yin meant three o'clock in the morning.

Under this underworld schedule, where Yang energy gradually wanes and Yin energy grows, Lin Ye had managed to survive for half a month.

If it weren't for his naturally hot constitution, which the old man boasted was a "Pure Yang Dao Body" that only appears once in a century, any normal person would have been playing landlord with their ancestors in the afterlife long ago after spending every night until dawn with this pile of paper figures and spirit tablets.

The rain fell harder, and the sky outside was as dark as dusk.

Lin Ye pulled over a rocking chair and lay lazily behind the counter.

As a Funeral Shop that opened at mealtime and closed in the middle of the night, business was naturally so dismal it could make the God of Wealth weep.

The slow rhythm of the raindrops went drip-drop, and Lin Ye's gaze involuntarily drifted past the curtain of the front shop toward the main hall in the backyard.

The layout of this old house was a typical "four waters returning to the hall" courtyard.

Theoretically, it was good Feng Shui for gathering wealth, but the old man had insisted on building a light-blocking black shed right in the center of the courtyard on the "Five Ghosts" ominous spot, housing a heavy black coffin made of sunken wood weighing over a thousand catties.

Before leaving, the old man had mysteriously said that the coffin contained a "marriage" arranged for him, telling him never to touch it recklessly and that when the time was right, his wife would naturally come to the door.

"What the hell kind of engagement is that? What decent person raises a wife in a coffin? Aren't they afraid she'll get moldy?"

At the time, Lin Ye just assumed the old man's senility was acting up again.

But over the past half-month, whenever midnight approached, he always felt wisps of cold air seeping out from that black coffin, and he could even vaguely hear the sound of fingernails scratching against wood.

"Since I'm idle anyway, I might as well go light some incense to keep things from acting up tonight."

Lin Ye stood up, stretched, and walked to the shelf on the side to prepare to take three sticks of incense.

Because the light was too dim, his fingertips accidentally brushed against the bamboo frame of a paper-crafted red horse as he reached for the incense.

"Hiss—"

The bamboo strip was razor-sharp, and a cut was instantly opened on Lin Ye's index finger, with bright red blood gushing out.

Just as Lin Ye was about to look for a bandage, that drop of blood followed his fingertip and dripped with a plop onto a stack of blank yellow talisman paper used for drawing charms nearby.

In an instant, a strange change occurred!

The drop of blood didn't seep in; instead, it seemed to have been rolled in boiling water, emitting a strange, bloody scent that carried a scorching Pure Yang Qi.

This scent followed the draft through the hall and drifted straight toward the backyard.

"Thump!"

The black coffin made of sunken wood in the backyard, which had been silent for half a month, suddenly let out a dull, loud noise, as if something heavy had slammed into the lid from inside.

Immediately following that, the temperature all around dropped sharply, and the thermometer on the counter plummeted from 25 degrees to 10 degrees before his very eyes.

At this moment, the paper effigies in the shop moved without any wind, and they all simultaneously turned their stiff, painted smiling faces toward the backyard!

Lin Ye's scalp tingled, and his heart jumped into his throat.

The instinct of his Pure Yang Dao Body made every hair on his body stand on end.

Just as he turned to grab the butcher knife the old man had left behind, his vision distorted, and a translucent light screen popped up without warning.

Accompanying it was a female voice that felt numbing to the bones, as if she were whispering right into his ear:

"Ding! "My Lord, Please Behave Yourself" System at your service. Detected that the host's Pure Yang Qi has leaked, awakening a thousand-year-old extreme Yin object. Please make a choice within three minutes, or the system will randomly execute the optimal (most shameless) plan."

Lin Ye was stunned.

"What?! A system? Isn't this the golden finger from web novels?!"

But before he could even feel ecstatic, he was broken out in a cold sweat by the four options that popped up on the light screen:

[Option A: Righteous and Awe-inspiring — Immediately bite your tongue, rush into the backyard holding an Eight Trigrams mirror, and shout, "Monster, prepare to die!"]

[Reward: One century-old peach wood sword.]

[Consequence: Leng Yue's favorability will plummet, and you will be strangled to death in the courtyard with one hand due to the overwhelming gap in strength.]

[Option B: Thirty-Six Stratagems — Scramble out of the shop and call the police for help.]

[Reward: Stamina + 10.]

[Consequence: The police will treat you like a lunatic, and Leng Yue will go on a rampage because her Yang energy is not pacified, slaughtering everything within a five-mile radius.]

[Option C: Take advantage of the chaos — Rush into the backyard, rip off the coffin lid, and shout affectionately, "Wife, I'm here!"]

[Reward: Yang Qi limit + 50, Leng Yue's favorability + 30.]

[Consequence: You will experience what true 'ice and fire' feels like.]

[Option D: Shamelessness exposed — Walk to the front of the coffin, knock on the lid three times, and ask politely: "Hello, SF Express, your takeout has arrived, please open the coffin to sign for it."]

[Reward: Obtain the limited-time title "Audacious" (Charm + 10, Pain - 50% while equipped), randomly trigger special interaction.]

"What kind of deadly options are these!"

Lin Ye complained frantically in his mind.

A and B meant death either way, and C...

Looking at the black coffin in the backyard that had started to emit tangible black resentment, he swallowed hard and gritted his teeth:

"System, I choose D! At least there's a pain reduction, so I can die with some dignity!"

The moment he made his choice, Lin Ye took a deep breath, forced himself to endure his trembling legs, lifted the curtain, and walked into the dim backyard courtyard.

Raindrops hit the black shed, making a rapid pattering sound.

The black coffin made of sunken wood was trembling violently; three of the ink lines wrapped around the lid had already snapped, and blackened blood was seeping out from the gaps.

Lin Ye swallowed a mouthful of saliva, walked to the coffin, curled his finger, and actually knocked three times on the heavy lid.

"Knock, knock, knock."

Then, in the deathly silence, he pretended to be calm and spoke:

"Hello, SF Express, your takeout has arrived, please open the coffin to sign for it."